Jornal Reptiliano

Noticia de primeira página:

Foi avistada uma barcaça à deriva entre a neblina, que transportava, segundo os nossos reporteres, um senhor padre. Por momentos a neblina dissipou-se e o padre bramiu
"The GREAT PAN IS ALIVE!
The GREAT PAN IS ALIVE!
The GREAT PAN IS ALIVE!"
Voltou a desaparecer por entre a brancura, e os nossos reporteres souberam que ele era a morte.

Pensamos ter indentificado o personagem:

Segundo um Mago formado na Escola da Grande Divina Providência, que comunica também com os nossos sacerdotes, foi descoberto segundo um "talk show" realizado por via de transmissão astral, telepática e de nitidez akashica, um senhor padre estudante das estrelas, conhecedor de muitas linguas, amante de arqueologia, e que é dado pelo nome profano de Zelator Celestial. Este padre revelou uma nova peça do vaticano à Grande Fraternidade.

Estas foram as suas palavras quando interrogado sobre a origem desta nova peça da antiguidade:
"No, no. I lack the ability to speak with God. After all, I am only a priest. We don’t do those kind of things without first getting permission from a bishop. Sorry, I couldn’t help but throw in a joke. Take care my friend. "


Aqui está um excerto da ilustre obra, sendo que faz esta parte da constituição dos textos apocrifos:

"Don’t complain to Me that I am absent, long gone, or that I am remiss in taking an interest in your activities.

Hast thou forgotten? Have you fool no memory? A thousand years for Me is but a watch in the night. Morning has not yet come and I AM not yet done.

What mortal dare suggest that I be charged with dereliction of duty when it comes to fulfilling My Covenant or maintaining my sovereignty over history?

(God’s laughter)
Where is the prosecutor with the evidence to indict Me for the laws I create and deliver through my prophets?

Where is the jury with the neutrality to deliberate motive and opportunity regarding human fate and destiny?

(more laughter)
Where is the judge who understands case and precedent so he could judge Me, I who hold in the palms of My hands galaxies beyond number?

I require only one more or less righteous man one hour a day for forty-five years and I will place into his hands the exact hour of the life span of any dictator on earth. Such is the degree to which I openly share My power with humanity.

One hour a day meditate on the wonders that are around you arrayed and every other soul on earth—its depth, its breadth, it essence, the life within it and the nature of its power—it shall be revealed to you with perfect clarity.

How can you say, suggest, or imply for a moment, for an instant, that I AM not fully present and ready, willing, and able to work side by side with you in establishing justice upon the earth?

You think that I jest? That I AM a stand up comedian with an audience I have failed to inform that it is OK to laugh at My jokes?

I Am not done. Half of all that I Am--My Love can be found in the touch of a woman’s skin.

Hidden in that brain of yours is not just a wilderness of cinder cones, volcanoes exploding, lava tubes, and lava flowing, and the terrible hunger of lightning slashing the throat of a tree as it flashes into the ground to be free—I AM more than desire burning and fire’s endless yearning.

Hast thou never touched a woman’s breasts and been breathless? Have you never flesh against flesh and with a caress tasted the very Wonder of the Love with which I created the universe?

Have you never contemplated a woman’s image? Beyond the power of mind, only the divine within you can grasp, clasp, and find peace at last in her enfolding arms. How can I reveal My Mystery more plainly or display it with greater simplicity and precision?

The entire universe, its treasures, opportunities, wonders, and beauty are interwoven and bound within these depths--In the touch of a woman’s skin is the power that gives birth to the stars and sets the planets in motion around the sun. I suggest you try a little harder to decipher the laws of nature and the beauty of My creation.

Even to the archangels I have not revealed these things but to you I have given the keys to unlock My Mysteries.

I could have limited My revelation to the oceans, the rivers, the lakes, the seas, the rain, the teardrop, the blood in your veins. But I did not stop with these. In the touch of her skin is a moment without end, the very mystery unfolding of life giving birth to life and of one heart flowing into and through another.

Do you think that when I placed such a capacity for pain within your nervous system that I did not more than balance the equation with a joy and an ecstasy that more than justify the suffering?

As I Exist all that I AM I have revealed to you should you but search out the treasures hidden within your senses—the perception, sensation, and their transformation through imagination.

Come. Let us deal right now with whether I Am as distant as you imagine or whether I have turned My back on creation.

Answer for Me one single question--It is the one I have been asking you day unto day and night unto night from the beginning, Why won’t you love Me?"

Devido à natureza do apócrifo e à invulgar disposição do padre, permitimo-nos a questão do aultério, respondeu, meio trémulo:

"In a society where women are not fully aroused
The eyes of men are blind
Their hearts are closed.
Because they do not see
The inner light shining in all things,
They fail to attain their destiny."

O leitor do nosso jornal pode pesquisar mais sobre o assunto por meios do seguinte endereço:

http://www.lava.net/~pagios/talkshow3.htm